You Have Bad Breath (Halitosis)

03 July 2010

Well maybe not all of you have bad breath, but I know a few people who consistently have bad breath. I'm not talking about bad breath caused by eating a salad with onions or something with garlic in it whereby after a little while it goes away; we all get that sometimes. I am talking about people who's breath is atrocious every single day and the smell is the same. It also seems that these people tend to be "close talkers" (see video below with a scene from Seinfeld) and get right up close to you when they talk so you can smell their nasty foulness.

YouTube: Social Awareness – Close Talker

There is something wrong with you people that have chronic bad breath. You must either have poor oral hygiene habits, an underlying serious health issue or a combination of both. If you are one of these people or even suspect that that you are (and no one has had the guts to tell you) check out this link to the Mayo Clinic about this subject.

Now let's move on to another interesting topic related to this. What is the typical reaction people take when they're told they have bad breath or some other offending issue? What I usually see is a hostile reaction whereby the person being told strikes back saying "No I don't!" and then they proceed to go on the offensive and attack the messenger by calling them names or pointing out some shortcoming of theirs, thereby justifying their own bad breath, even though they think they don't have it. Or they say something to the messenger about them being rude by saying such a thing.

Now wait just a cotton-picking minute here! If I am the messenger telling you that you have bad breath, why are you acting all offended that I told you? I was first offended by YOUR bad breath and that makes ME the VICTIM here, not you. By me telling you of the problem, I am in hopes that you will do something about your nastiness like maybe brush your teeth, tongue and floss more than once a month or go see a dentist. You have no right getting upset that I told you about this, because you are going around offending everyone you talk to.

Additionally, these people with the chronic bad breath amaze me that they can have spouses or boyfriends/girlfriends. I say that because how can their mate stand kissing them? This baffles me a lot. My only theory on this is that their mate must have the same bad breath as them so they don't even notice it, or their sniffer is totally broken. There is no way I could be with someone who has chronic bad breath that makes me want to vomit when I am near them. I couldn't handle it, I just couldn't. It doesn't matter how nice she is or how beautiful she may be, if her breath makes the paint peal off the walls, she has got to go!

Download the pdf version with pictures here.